Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Walking the Path

My husband left last Friday and doesn't return until Monday. He'll be home for less than three weeks, during which time my oldest is scheduled to get his adenoids out, unless he catches the germ his younger siblings have right now, in which case we'll have to reschedule, except having already taken him directly to the ER with younger siblings in tow after a so-called simple tooth extraction while my husband was away last summer, I don't want to have this surgery done unless both parents are actually in the country. This year is looking remarkably like last year in a lot of ways: kid surgery (which was, indeed, rescheduled last year because of illness), husband travel...I am working on walking the path with grace, however. And I really do mean working on it.

I have, shall we say, tangled feelings regarding all this travel. I would not choose to carry so much of the home-life responsibilities by myself, but I wasn't given a choice. I wasn't consulted at all; I may have elected to do things differently, way back when, had I known the travel would grow and grow and grow, no end in sight. It's not that I'm not capable; I'm extremely capable. And it's not that I shy away from difficult things; I have always been a hard worker, willing to do what needs to be done. It's that I feel powerless. I think that in any difficult circumstance, the difficulty is compounded when we feel helpless or powerless. I didn't choose this. I don't want this. It doesn't matter.

I'm working on it.

Meanwhile, I wrote myself a colorful list of things I want to make/do/research while he's away. I'm chipping away at that list slowly. Here is some of what I've accomplished--and all photos are dimly lit photos taken by my phone, so I can tweet them. But you get the idea, well-lit or not.

This stamp was inspired by Egyptian faience, specifically this hippo. This second stamp is also thanks to the hippo:

I have a couple more stamps I want to carve, too. And I have some turquoise fabric. And I have some ideas of combining them...

And just as I painted rocks for the kids for Valentine's Day, I decided to paint wooden eggs for them for their Easter baskets. This is my daughter's, in progress.

I just...you know, some of the lines aren't perfect--I probably should have used a Sharpie rather than paint for the black outlines--but I just get a kick out of this every time I look at it. I plan to use the same shiny-making acrylic varnish on the eggs that I use on the rocks to seal it all up. I think she is going to LOVE it. I'm hoping to paint Yoda and Darth Vader for my boys' Easter baskets.

I also have "knit two sleeves" on that to-do list, and I haven't started them. I have six more days on this trip. Think I can do it??


Michelle said...

Harper just peeked over and pointed at the egg to say, "i want that!" So, you KNOW it's good! :)

Big stuff up there. That's all I can say on here. Cheering you on!

Suburban Correspondent said...

I seem to get MORE done when my husband is away. Don't know why...

Donna Lee said...

Walking the path takes work no matter what the circumstances you find yourself in. Being able to do it with grace and patience (as you do) is the difficult part. I hope the adenoid surgery goes off as planned and without any added difficulties.

Carolyn said...

Love the egg, it's adorable! Patience and grace will see you through, stay strong!

Cameron said...

"Working" on things is still a forward direction....I'm so sorry you feel helpless, though....that is never a strong position to be in.

Looks like you are making the best of it. It won't be forever. Stay strong and know you have us to gripe to always :)

Cute egg!...and the stamps are really cool! I can see so many uses for those!

Karen Isaacson said...

boy did you hit the nail on the head with the notion of choice and power (or lack thereof). I feel that when I'm choosing to do something, I'm invincible - no matter how daunting or unpleasant the task, I will kick butt because I chose to be here. without the choice, the exact same situation is a festering bog of resentment and bitterness. sigh.
thinking of you my dear.
(and that egg is awesome - can't wait to see the ones you do for the boy)